Enough of This Shit

There's an epidemic out there. Not the kind that kills Gwyneth Paltrow in a movie none of us saw, but the kind that makes you want to punch your computer screen or de-friend someone on Facebook for posting 73,000 versions of the same thing on your Wall. I speak of the Shit [Insert stereotype, race or sexual preference] Say epidemic quickly devouring bandwidth on YouTube.

From Shit Girls Say to Shit Liza Minnelli Says these video montages don't seem to leave a stone left unturned in the realm of people we want to make fun of/pay homage to. Now I enjoy a comedic montage of cliched phrases and expletives as much as the next person, but I grow weary of being told of a new video under the veil of Shit X Says every 18 minutes.

To help nudge this trend out of center stage, I'd like to suggest a few topics YouTubers can cover so we can just be done with it and go back to watching pandas sneeze, Icelandic singers attack reporters, weathermen scream at roaches, and music videos from the era of Kurt Loder and Kennedy.

a talented Joyce DeWitt lookalike gives birth to Shit Liza Minnelli Says

In no particular order:

Shit White Girls Say When they watch Shit White Girls Say to Black Girls

Shit Julia Roberts Says to Herself in the Morning When She Feels Irrelevant

Shit You Hope No One Heard You Say About Them at a Party

Shit You Say To Pull Your Foot Out of Your Mouth at a Party When You Realize Everyone Heard You Say That the Host is A Neurotic Slut With Crappy Furniture

Shit You Say While You're Shitting

Shit Carol Channing Says

Shit Carol Channing and Tatum O'Neal Might Say to Each Other if they Were Both Dropping Acid

Shit Julia Sugarbaker Might Say to the Conservative Party 

Shit Nancy Grace's Twins Say 

Shit Nancy Grace's Twins Say in 15 years

Shit Andy Cohen Says to Get Laid

Shit People Who Slept With Andy Cohen Say

Shit Selma Hayek and Penelope Cruz Used To Say When Their English Was Indiscernible

Shit Facebook Says to Friendster

Shit Gay Guys Say...Oh shit. Have we come full circle? Oh. Okay. Good. Now stop this madness.