Double Zs

It’s Ziyi Zhang’s birthday today which may mean absolutely nothing to you, but for me, it’s a momentous occasion that recalls the time, many moons ago, when I was working in a Beverly Hills boutique and wondering why 2 Bachelors degrees were only earning me the price-of-a-latte more an hour than minimum wage. Just as I was about to slice the underside of my forearm with a boxcutter to escape having to hear Annie Lennox’s Walking in a Winter Wonderland again, in walks dear Ziyi – head slightly larger than cinema might have you believe, if I recall accurately – with her immaculately coiffed mommy and equally refined entourage of aunties. Sooner than later I’m ringing her up for an emerald green cashmere sweater while she and her mother graciously thank me. And as I tell her the total she takes out her credit card, places it gently in my palm and softly, demurely, adorably says: “My cod looks so smor in yo hanz” thus making me a fan for life.